A Letter : Sweet Baby Jax
Dear Jax,
I remember the first time I laid eyes on you. It was June of 2006. I was a young woman in her mid-20s, tangled up in a relationship that felt sure and promising, yet there was an insecurity in my spirit and a palpable ache and desire deep within. I was searching for joy, meaning, playfulness, connection, and love.
I was ready and willing for another cat, ready to be a mama. This time it felt different. I was older and living on my own with my boyfriend, Dan. I searched the screen looking at tiny little boxed images of gray and white male tabby kittens. Then your face appeared. In an instant, I knew you were the one. Your wide-eyed tea green eyes and gentle gaze had me at hello. Your expression was one of curiosity and hope, with a hint of sadness and longing saying, “pick me.” Little did I know that you chose me.
It was love at first sight when I held your tender tiny body up to my face, locking eyes. Your character captured my heart. I can still feel the soft touch of your petite paws on my skin and the fresh smell of baby fur on my nose and mouth as I brought your body up to my lips and kissed you for the first time.
Soulmates passing through another incarnation, together in physical form, just as we liked it—you in yours and me in mine. My life forever changed and, in many ways, began again the day I adopted you and brought you home. From here on out, I would call you mine, and I would be yours.
True, your pale soulful sea green eyes first attracted me, but it would be the fullness of your personality, being, and unconditional devotion and love that made me love you more and more each day, pushing past the limits of my heart.
Everyone you met would happily tell me how handsome you were and what great features and striking black striping you had. I would, of course, nod and happily oblige. Trying not to take too much credit for your devilish grin and gorgeous ways.
Your marks unique to you with velvety marble eyes defined with a midnight black stencil and oval white frames were the perfect picture. Your wonderous sage eyes held secrets and stories ancient and wise.
You aged gracefully, becoming more distinguished and defined. Your coat, features, and eyes darkened and developed with time and mood. Still, your gesture and appearance always carried qualities of the sweet baby face I adored – your soft pink and tan nose, a patch of white for a mouth, white whiskers, and blemishes of brown highlighting your cheeks.
Eye gazing was our favorite pastime. You would crawl into my lap and look up into my eyes. Time stood still. We spoke a language only you, and I could translate. A deep knowing and certainty of our connection and love. Tales of past lives and journeys taken together.
The delicate dance between our souls, two bodies into one, moving to the rhythm and music of our gospel. Your eyes rocked my gypsy soul, letting my spirit fly. I came home with the sound of your love and the touch of your skin. We were born before the wind, younger than the sun, sailing into the mystic.
Jax, how sweet it is to be loved by you.
“Oh, the sun is surely sinking down
But the moon is slowly rising
So this old world must still be spinning round
And I still love you
So close your eyes
You can close your eyes, it's alright
I don't know no love songs
I can't sing the blues anymore
Oh but I can sing this song
You can sing this song when I'm gone”
~ James Taylor